03 November 2006

how to preach on the mission field

i got this from a missionary friend of mine i've quoted before in here - brian burnham (in papua new guinea). they shared this in their e-newsletter the other day:

We wish each one of you could be here to experience everything that we are during the teaching. We were thinking if you could just create the same environment that we have here for the teaching it might help you experience it with us.
Here is a step by step process on creating your very own mock teaching setting!

  1. First thing you need to do is go find a large dirt area. Flood it with water, make sure there are lots of holes so you have puddles everywhere.

  2. For seating, just go find some pieces of firewood. Make sure they aren't round, sanded, or smooth in any way and have lots of splinters.

  3. Get 3 pigs. Set them in the middle right where Jason is standing.

  4. Get 3 dogs. Set them in the middle right where Jason is standing.

  5. Get 3 chickens. Set them in the middle right where Jason is standing

  6. Get 3 toddlers. Set them in the middle right where Jason is standing.

  7. Get 25 sheets of newspaper and 25 leaves of tobacco. Roll up cigarettes and hand them to all the men in the crowd.

  8. Get buai (the local chewing tobacco, it is bright red in color) Hand that out to any other guy that doesn't have a cigarette.

  9. Make sure the pigs, chickens, dogs, and children use the dirt floor as a bathroom right by Jason.

  10. Get one crazy lady, make sure she dances and swears in the back.

  11. Make sure everyone has a lice partner to pick out the lice as they listen.

  12. Now, go get 200 lost people and be prepared for what God is about to do!!!!

Because God created laughter..and if I didn't laugh about this I think it just might get to me after awhile!:-)
Jason, Kellie, Micah, Sophia, and Malachi Knapp

another good lesson for you on being a missionary... sometimes you just gotta have a sense of humor.

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